It is with pleasure that I introduce you to @LuciferPTB!
Thumpa: Hey! Why don't you start off by introducing yourself so everyone knows who you are?
Lucifer: *gives you a hate-filled stare of rage* I am Lucifer. The Morning Star. NOT Satan.
Thumpa: [Coughs] Touchy.. [Clears my throat] Anyway, Hello, Morning star! Welcome to our blog. First question, I guess, is if you're not Satan.. why do people call you that?
Lucifer: Because the people who wrote "The Bible" are morons. I am not a cartoon demon with horns, a tail or a smoking pitchfork. DO NOT CALL ME SATAN!
Thumpa: [Awkward silence] I won't call you Satan. I swear to God. Tell us a little bit about your history, Lucifer. I'm sure everyone wants to know.
Lucifer: *flares my vessel's nostrils and clenches my jaw* Do not speak of my Father. Ever.
Thumpa: [Holds back a laugh] My apologies. Now what about your history?
Lucifer: *rolls my eyes, grabbing my head in frustration* Everyone has heard some form of the history, despite how many inaccuracies there may be. What it all boils down to is the fact that I refused to love my Father's flawed creations *gives you a disgusted look* and he banished me from our home. Actually, he had Michael do the dirty work, which also included imprisoning me in the pit for all of eternity. Does that work for you, cockroach?
Thumpa: Rabbit, actually, buddy. And yes. It works perfectly. Next question. WHY ARE YOU SO TOUCHY?
Lucifer: Because it is taking all of my self-control not to smite you on the spot.
Thumpa: Charming. Speaking of charming. Why this vessel? [Points at picture below] Did you finally give up on Sammy?
Lucifer: *sighs* No, I have not given up on Sammy. I still wish to get inside of him, but it may take a bit longer than I anticipated, so in the meantime, I will choose other *coughs* humans *coughs* who are of the more attractive variety. Apparently there are several in this place called Hollywood.
Thumpa: I hear it's a nice place. Why is it taking longer to get inside Sammy? Is it hard to penetrate his meat suit?
Lucifer: Well, yeah. There's this whole stigma about Lucifer being a bad guy. I don't why. I'm not that bad, I just want to eviscerate the entire human race.
Thumpa: Uhh, don't you think that's probably why Sam doesn't want you to enter him? He is human, after all.
Lucifer: No, I mostly think it's because his brother Dean hates me. I mean, when you think about it, I'd probably not have such a strong desire to even end all of you sorry ingrates if it were not for the fact that I was banished to an eternity of torment inside that pit. I was just merely suggesting to Father that his flawed creations should simply be...recreated into something less flawed.
Thumpa: Well, we can't be that bad. I mean look at you.. [Tries not to drool] You're smokin' hot.
Lucifer: That's a common misconception. I am actually quite frigid to the touch. There is no sort of sulfuric type smoke billowing from this vessel anywhere at all.
Thumpa: How come you don't want Dean as your vessel? Not that he'd say yes, but look at him.. he's way hot.. [Swoons a little bit] NB: YES. STARE AT IT, PEOPLE.
Lucifer: Because he isn't my chosen vessel. And I dislike the guy. His thoughts are quite disgusting, especially when it comes to a certain female in his life.
Thumpa: I guess he's allowed to. I know for a fact that women have .. errr.. thoughts about Dean Winchester, too. [Awkward cough] Dean aside, are you afraid that Michael will kill you one day? One day soon, at that, since the Winchesters have already kick started the Apocalypse? I mean, it's destiny, afterall.
Lucifer: Destiny is a word people throw around to give them hope. Yes, I suppose it is destiny for me to die at the hands of my older brother, if only to bring comfort to you disgustingly flawed creatures. I've spoken with my brother on several occasions recently, and he has yet to try and stop me. Lilith and I *tortured* an "innocent girl" and Michael did nothing. I suppose you're looking for a small ray of hope in this "destiny," but perhaps all you will find my brother may also be starting to have doubts himself. *slow grin, tilting my head to the side* My own brother, who jailed me without a second thought after being ordered to do so by Father, who I am sure will aim to strike me down when the time does come. *begins laughing, looking upwards and growing quiet, thoughtful* Tell me, cockroach. *points to the night sky, slowly tracing the patterns of the stars*, how often do you take the time to appreciate the perfection, the beauty, the amazing vastness of all creation put here by my Father? You are capable of glancing at the stars as you wish, yet you know nothing more of them than you did fifty years ago. *begins speaking even quieter* The stars were always my favorite. My brother and I used to look at them together. When I was in the pit, I was never able to gaze upon them again. Do you know what that's like? To be banished from even looking upon that which gave you the greatest sense of happiness?
Thumpa: Wow. I can't say I know what that's like.. I'm speechless right now. Can I hug you?
Lucifer: *snaps my head back in your direction, my eyes suddenly filling with a disgusted hate once more* Do not mistake me for someone who needs physical contact in order to assure my stability and survival. I do not require pity. I have grown quite agitated with the number of humans who wish to hug me lately.
Thumpa: Speaking of which, I hear you're quite a hit in your site (http://hell-on-earth.ning.com)'s chat. Everyone loves you, right?
Lucifer: Everyone has an obsession with my vessel. They tell me they love me, but mostly I just do what I can to refrain from smiting the lot of them. They are all rather incompetent and believe that by using sarcasm and smarting off to me that I will somehow respect them more for not fearing me. They would be incorrect. Those are the ones I wish to torture painfully and slowly.
Thumpa: Well, Lucifer. Thanks so much for.. cooperating with me during this interview! You can have a lovely bouquet of flowers as a token of my appreciation!
Lucifer: *takes the flowers, looking at them closely* Ah, I do love flowers. They are one of Father's superior creations. Despite the fact you cut their stems, ripping them from their home and shoved them all together in this festive wrapping, I do enjoy looking at them and shall try to make your death quick and painless when the time comes.
So after that hilarious and rather weird conversation I had with Lucifer, we flipped a switch and I had a nice chat with the brains behind the character!
Thumpa: Hey, human! [Laughs] Let's start off with you introducing yourself.
Thumpa: With an E! AWESOME. That makes you so cool. I guess I should ask the most obvious question. Why pick Lucifer out of everyone from Supernatural to role play?
Lucifer: Because Dean was already taken. No, just kidding. Really, someone else had asked me if I would play Lucifer along with one of their characters and I thought I'd give it a try, not thinking I'd be able to do much with the character, but he has actually turned out to be one of my favorite characters to portray now.
Thumpa: I can tell! The next thing I have to ask is why Chris Pine? I mean, I have no objection to you using him. At all. And I'm sure no one else does, either. But I'm curious.
Lucifer: Umm...because he's hot as hell? And also, the way I saw it when I chose this role, Lucifer was Heaven's most beautiful angel. This was something he knew, and I feel like he would aim to have a vessel who was also considered attractive by all. He is supposed to be the master of deception and lies, and what better way to gain someone's trust than showing up in the meatsuit of someone most girls trip over themselves to get a good look at?
Thumpa: That's genius! And it totally makes sense. Like you said earlier, not much has been said about Lucifer in the show, just the basics. So how do you go about portraying the role?
Lucifer: When trying to think as Lucifer would, I sort of grew this feeling of complete...anger he feels toward everyone, especially his brother Michael, his Father. I could see how Lucifer's own opinion displeased his Father to the point that God had him cast away before he may have had the opportunity to corrupt anyone else. He wanted everyone to love humans as he did, and Lucifer would not have that. His ultimate punishment was not only being banished from his home by his brother, who had been ordered to do so by his Father, but in that he was also imprisoned into what he has referred to as the cage sometime after that. From the views people now have on Hell, or may be starting to believe about it, it is not fire and brimstone, but actually cold, devoid of companionship, light, warmth. He was literally trapped inside a pit that he could not escape. He was lonely and bored and eventually created his army of demons. He's watched the worst kinds of torture happen in this place and he honestly hates being there. He is miserable. He is angry. Above all, he is hurt, but his pride gets in the way of admitting that. Over time, he eventually began losing his mind, and where he is now, he has complete bouts of insanity, especially when he is around his brother Michael, the one who put him where he ended up. His emotions are conflicted because of the strained relationship, and the fact that he believes without a doubt in his mind that his Father no longer loves him. And that feeling of losing any sort of hope he may have been holding onto will ultimately send him over the edge.
Thumpa: Thank you so much for letting me interview you! It was an absolute pleasure and it was so, so hilarious.
Lucifer: Thanks for interviewing me! This was a lot of fun! I hope I don't bore anyone with my ramblings on Lucifer. *laughs*
Thumpa: I'm sure they'll find it amusing - I did. [Laughs]
During the interview, Kelley and I were in a phonecall. And in the middle of “serious” questioning, some random things happened that I found –hilarious-.
Firstly, she was trying to send me a link of Dean to use. And all I could hear was several versions of “I can’t get it up again!” So..
Thumpa: Lucifer! Can you get it back up!? *dies*
Lucifer: I have no problem getting anything up.
Secondly, her adorable nephew walked into the room and started talking about reindeer superheroes because he wanted to watch Iron Man! And this is what happened.
Thumpa: Lucifer, do you wanna be a reindeer superhero, too?!
Lucifer: *unamused* No. I want to be Batman.
Thumpa: Sorry, buddy. Dean claimed Batman. With the super pen flick.
Lucifer: As if I care. I can smite his sorry, smug ass whenever I please. I don't care how much it might anger Michael for me to do so.
Apologies for the length, but I hope you enjoyed reading this interview as much as I enjoyed hosting it!
Thumpa out! ;)